Travelling up the Princes this arvo (as you do) I saw a sight for... well, I don't know what sort of eyes. If they were sore, I think this site would have made them sorer. Or perhaps water slightly.
Imagine a Very Hot Car, and by that, I mean some White Trash DoofMobile. LOTS of stickers on the back window, including a really big one of the steer with enormous horns that I always thought was a brand logo, but might, in fact, just be a single entendre. BIG chromilicious exhaust. And a GINORMOUS freaking mudguard - I say that in the singular because there was only one, big, wide, thick, long chunk of manhood, I mean, mudguard. Another single entendre, methinks. It certainly dominated the design theme of Classic Yob.
But! Gentle Reader! That was not the icing on the cake.
The icing was three of these:
Real.
Lifesized.
Rivetted onto the mudguard in a row.
Very, very shiny, distractingly glinting in the sun, polished with care - probably by the Classic Yob's girlfriend, if Classic Yob was in a good mood. I understand this to be the ritual through scientific observation - in the 70's, my brother's girlfriend was occasionally allowed to use the white crayon on the tyres of his Totally Hot Holden.
I wish I had've had a camera with me, but then, I was going 100k/h, so there's NO way I could have captured its unbridled glory.
I really hope those horseshoes bring him luck, otherwise, the owner just looks even more of a d!ckh34d, eh?
